Poetic Justice

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Bad-mind, Gymnastics, Hate, Marisa Dick, Negativity, Rio2016 Olympics, Thema Williams, Trinidad and Tobago

I was waiting for the preliminaries of gymnastics in the Olympics to pass before I posted this, simply because I wanted people to see something. I am not going to explain the situation between the choosing of Marisa Dick over Thema Williams. The story is out there. Everyone has an idea of what went on even though frankly MOST of us still don’t know the facts even though we are okay with spouting our opinion on it.

But if you want to know more about the story you can read it here and here.

What I AM here to discuss is the reaction to Marisa going to the Olympics and now that she has not made it to the next round, I can safely say my point has been made.

What was my point? If you had been on Facebook following the litany of comments under any video or mention of Marisa representing Trinidad and Tobago in the Olympics, you would have seen the long, disgusting slew of hate messages there.

Yes, it was on Twitter as well, but I approach Twitter differently than Facebook. If it’s not on my home stream, I ain’t concerned, and my Twitter neighbours while I am ABSOLUTELY sure had their opinions on Miss Dick, kept their decorum together. I just follow wonderfully level headed people.  😀

Facebook on the other hand, not so much. And the fact that I have a lot of pages means I see a lot too. I have been accused of being un-patriotic because I supported Thema, but then wait I refused to bash Marisa too and wished her all the best, so I was also accused of being naive and ‘falling for anything’ and being a band-wagonist! A band-wagonist? Really?

Here’s the thing, which I tried to explain to people who claimed to be trying to teach their children the ‘right’ thing by their stance as they openly sent death threats to the young woman.

I support Thema, and let me see what the TTOC is going to do after the Olympics about how she was removed. She’s doing something on her end by suing the TTGF but we haven’t forgotten what happened and that the TTOC let this corruption slide. Does that mean that I am going to withdraw my support for the other athletes? Of course not, and those of you doing that are just looking for an excuse since you weren’t going to support them anyway!

Don’t think for a minute me being upset with the situation will catch me lambasting Marisa either, at ANY time, because unlike a lot of you I know how bad vibes does work.

You all remember that song we used to sing when we were little, ‘Love is something if you give it away, it will come right back to you.’ You all remember that? Well, yuh know what, bad vibes works just the same way.

Separate story here, I know this young lady, pretty, fiesty and we always have a good laugh when we are together but she could bad talk people! And don’t talk about if you cross her, instant hatred towards you for life. For LIFE. Knows nothing about forgiveness! Nothing! But yet still, she’s always praying and begging God to work in her life but could never see her way. The amount of bad stuff that has happened to this woman since I have met her. We’re the same age and I haven’t had half her troubles in my life.

Now I understand what is going on with her…

 

“Hate is something if you give it away, it will come right back to you.”

…but she doesn’t get that and Trinis, I’m sorry but the majority of you all cannot grasp that concept either. You all want to talk about bandwagons? We always quick to jump on the HATE bandwagon, spewing our filth and negativity towards other people. I don’t know if is just the drama and the hype you all like but then you’re left wondering why you constantly catching hell in your life?

Because negativity attracts more negativity! Which is why, sad to say, but said young lady hasn’t spoken to me in a while because she realises I REFUSE to jump on the wagon with her. My positivity, even when I am upset, takes the wind out of her rants! And at the very least if I am really upset I would rather do this…

…until my emotions simmer down enough for me to make sense. I not playing that! When you deal in bad vibes, it does come right back to you. Like a boomerang.

I knew from the beginning, that IF there was bacchanal and bad mind going on in getting Marisa to the Olympics, then God help her. ‘Cause the bad foundation she started with was bound to crumble, and ent, so said so done? She did not make it past the prelims?

So what was the use of all that hate talk then?

You just opened the door to negativity in your life for no reason! You planted the seed of bad vibes around you and your family. You didn’t physically do anything to her (Thank God!) but you didn’t have to go that far either.

You could have just let karma do it’s work.

So all who want to ‘down with Dick’ and send death threats, I sorry for you. As I said, the same way karma came back to Marisa, bad vibes done beginning to take root in your life. Poetic justice waiting for you too.

But you know, I’m just another critic. What do I know? *shrug*

– Written by Travesaou

Copyright © 2010-2016 Critics May Lie All Rights Reserved

Express Article today Marisa Dick Down In Style

Let’s All Share

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blame, Boy falls into gorilla cage, Cincinnati gorilla killed, parent shamimg, Zoo

Okay, so let’s be honest for a second. I love honesty. It’s hard. Hell, it stings like a paper cut sometimes but 90% of the time if you have an open mind, it is worth it.

Of course most people don’t have open minds but that’s another topic.

What I want to highlight is the issue with the small child who crawled into a gorilla cage at the Cincinnati zoo and who was subsequently roughly dragged and tussled by one of the gorillas in there who was killed to save him.

Now the child was physically unharmed in the end but… *audible sigh* People, could you please stop with all the hate towards the mother of the child. It’s getting ridiculous now as hate rampages nowadays normally are.

Yes, my first thought was, ‘How the hell did he get in there? Wasn’t anyone watching him?’

But, and a BIG BUT! All you parents (and non-parents who have had to regularly watch children that are not your own), ask yourself, have you honestly never, ever, ever, EVER, EVER, ever (sing it like Kanye, you’ll understand) lost track of one of your children/temporary charges before?

Two blinks, and suddenly he’s a little further away from you than you would have liked.

Have they ALWAYS been in your sight the entire time you all were out? ESPECIALLY those with SEVERAL small children!

Please do something for me. Stop lying. Just stop. Stop passing blame.

Anything can happen in a few seconds. Especially with small, fast, tiny feet which is why you have to watch them so carefully but it is almost near impossible to keep your eyes on them ALL THE TIME! Deep within your heart YOU KNOW THIS! Yes, I’m looking at you parent police!

Did the gorilla have to die? Of course not. They could have tranquilised it but we don’t know what the full situation was like. Maybe they panicked, maybe they were unprepared. But that is not the mother’s fault (clearly this child has no father…) The zoo keepers chose that route and despite what we may think, they said they had good reason for it. Why was the facility so unsecured that a child could get into the cage to begin with? Maybe they just didn’t take 3 year old ninjas into account when they built it. I don’t know but the decision to shot the gorilla and not tranquilise him was their call. Not the mother’s.

But you know what is the real big question? Most people who were quick to scream, ‘omg, the poor gorilla is dead now. How stupid and selfish that it had to die over this’ would not think to ask…

“Omg, how stupid and selfish of the human race to cause the gorilla to be on the brink of extinction so that the only way we can preserve the species is in this tiny, fake, jungle reserve to keep it safe, from our own species.”

This lioness is not actually in the wild, and it’s just yawning.

Much misplaced compassion but the fact is the gorilla would still be alive if we didn’t have it in captivity in the first place and we have them in captivity because we keep killing them out so, nope, I don’t see how that’s the mother’s fault. That’s on all of us. The human race of course.

So if you are going to blame the mother, take your share of blame, one time!

– Written by Travesaou

Copyright © 2010-2016 Critics May Lie All Rights Reserved

This Could Have Been Me

Tags

Asami Nagakiya, Carnival 2016, death, Japanese pannist, Mayor Raymond Tim Kee, PCS Silver Stars Steel Orchestra, Port of Spain, Queens Park Savannah, steel pan, Trinidad and Tobago, victim blaming, Violence against women

Let me see how I am going to explain this now…

Following the Mayor of Port of Spain’s comments on the death of Japanese national Asami Nagakiya two days ago patrons met on Woodford Square in Port-of-Spain to share how his comments affected them and to protest his apparent unconscious discrimination towards women in a position of authority. I would like to do the same.

I hate to accuse people of indifference but if you are a man you cannot fully understand how the majority of women felt, which is why I was not surprised that so many men misunderstood the outrage, my own father (who is convinced it is a political ploy and the Mayor said nothing wrong) being one of them.

You can sympathise, as many men have. Thank you. Your support is appreciated. Trust me, it is! More than you know, because it means mind sets are changing.

However, there is just something that you will never fully grasp about what it literally feels to be a woman in this world. Especially a woman whose life isn’t sheltered by anyone (sheltered women tend not to get it either). For the kind of woman who takes chances and faces the world on her own terms, there are real dangers that lie await for her that just do not exist for men. And these women know this and live with the fear of it every single day.

Asami seemed to be one of those women. I am sure it was not easy and even a little terrifying for her to leave her home literally thousands of miles away and travel to another country to pursue a dream. This requires courage and faith, no matter who you are. Who knows what predators could have been waiting to dupe and take her away from the time she stepped off the plane that first day in Trinidad many years ago. I don’t need to know her to assure you as a woman that she had those fears, they were very real to her. She knew the risks of having to trust in the help of strangers and came anyway.

Now I am going to say something very controversial.

Every woman is afraid of men.

“I ain’t afraid of no one! This lioness run shit!”

Right?

Now before you triumphantly cast my opinion aside with your own ‘I Am Woman, Hear me Roar’ stance, understand this.

Saying that women fear men isn’t a statement to belittle them. It refers to a history long ingrained fear that most women are not even aware of. Much like the ingrained discrimination towards women and even misogyny that many men are not aware of. It refers to a fear that is continually perpetrated and confirmed by society’s actions towards women.

It doesn’t matter if on a scale of 1 to 10 you are a “scream and run away from even the sight of a man – 10” or a “mild fear but I’ll bust a cap in yo ass if you try something – 1” on the scale. There IS still a fear.

Test.

Women, I want you to imagine. Just a moment with me, really immerse yourself in this scenario and imagine you are walking completely alone in a car park or on a dark road somewhere. How you got there doesn’t matter. Where you are going doesn’t matter. This is a general scenario.

The point is that you have been sensing that someone or something has been following you for a while now. You feel in danger and finally you hear the footsteps coming clearly behind you and turn around quickly to see…

…… according to Mayor Tim Kee, let your imagination roll a bit.

Now be honest with what the ‘figure’ looked like, down to built, clothing and, most importantly gender. What IMMEDIATELY comes to mind? A cat? A dog? Another woman? What? What you see is a mental stereotype of your inner fears, the first thing you would expect should you be in that situation which is a common situation faced by many women around the world.

Mine would look like one of two things.

Yes, I am deathly afraid of dinosaurs, particularly velociraptors. Thank God they are extinct. Not kidding.

And the second most likely thing to come to mind which I am sure came to the minds of many women (be honest), is a shifty, crazy eyed, hungry looking man who is following me for God knows what.

Now with all of this in mind, I think it is understandable that the discovery of Miss Nagakiya’s body on Ash Wednesday and the subsequent discovery that she didn’t just have a major heart attack and die on the spot but that she was STRANGLED to death would make me and I am sure thousands of other women squirm inwardly, in the most horrible gut wrenching way.

That could have been me. I come home after dark all the time. I walk down dark roads, busy streets, take public transport at late hours ALL the time.

Does it make sense that I take these risks which to others might clearly be situations I can avoid? Because according to our Mayor Tim Kee I am responsible for my own safety.

So I should wait an extra hour (even though I am tired and know the longer I wait the harder it will be for me to get transportion) until an almost full car with at least two other women in it comes by. And I should take the long way around (and it real long eh, like a 40 minute walk longer when the short cut is two minutes!) instead of cutting through a side street to get home.

No, I should do that. It is after all my responsibility to keep myself safe.

And even moving around ‘Madea style’ isn’t a sure thing. Do guns protect women.

Or maybe I should just stay home, hide away from the dangerous world and never do anything or pursue a dream that requires me to come outside, in my life, EVER. But at least I would be safe, right? I am sure some woman who has been attacked in their own home where they thought they were safe had the same idea too.

What I want to ask the Mayor is why should these simple actions, of getting up and going to work, to school, having leisure activities, why should these things even be a risk for me? Why should I have to be afraid of being attacked alone on a dark street at all?

Is that a concern for my male counterparts because I see men taking that same short cut all the time but I wonder if they have the same fear as me or if they SHOULD be attacked will they be accused by our Mayor of being irresponsible with their safety?

Honestly, I wasn’t so much offended by the Mayor’s comments as I was hurt. Yeah, I was angry at first. The proof is all over Twitter. But later it just really upset me. Like the time I read that report about the pitbull that attacked and killed that little boy who was deaf and dumb. I couldn’t eat all day thinking of that. Imagine he never even ‘heard’ the dog coming and couldn’t speak to call for help. A truly terrifying death.

I looked at Miss Asami’s body and saw myself, saw my sister, my mother, saw every woman who I have ever cared about and felt an unsettling pain in my stomach. To know that this was all any of us would get if we were in that situation. A dismissive smile (yes, the man smiled in the report like it was actually amusing) from the authorities who are meant to help protect us. And while he may have later reflected on his comments as not being appropriate, why say it? It is very telling of some hidden beliefs he might have.

I agree with the march. Simply because (what Margaret Mead said) and also I had to really ask myself, do I really want someone with such underlying negative views on women making decisions about my safety? This is not me excusing people for not making better choices. This is me being genuinely concerned for my safety and saddened by the effort that would be put into bringing my possible demise by a madman to justice, because those responsible for bringing about that justice thought that maybe it was my fault!

The fact is that someone else’s bad intentions for you is not your fault.

Your comment could not have been more ill-timed and insensitive, Mr. Tim Kee. I would have had no problem if a circular was released a fortnight later from the mayor’s office, urging women (I am not kidding myself into believing they would say ‘everyone’. Please.) not to travel alone and beware of their surroundings while in the city and what not, because even though I find it unfair to always have to be looking over my back for the predator that might be lurking behind me, it is the reality.

But if that was your daughter Mr. Mayor, the ONLY thing you would have wanted to hear at that moment was, “I am sorry for your loss. We are doing everything to solve this. Our deepest sympathies go out to her family and friends.” Full stop. All of this outrage against you could have been avoided so easily.

One of the signs held by a participant of the march today as documented on Square Peg, Round Hole’s blog post Have a read there too!

Yes, Carnival was just around the corner. Even I find myself often shocked and confused at the display of revellers (not JUST women) during that time. But this woman’s death had nothing to do with the revellery of Carnival.

It had to do with someone who wished ill on Miss Asami. Someone who probably watched her and planned and acted on this wish (unless you also think she did something to make someone want to strangle her to death) subsequently ending her life.

And whether it was Carnival, Easter or a Christmas lime at home or whether she was dressed in a Carnival costume, or in a jeans and a t-shirt, or a burka, or with a sign around her neck saying ‘Please Don’t Hurt Me. God is watching you’, it wouldn’t have changed a damn thing if they wanted to do that to her.

And if you don’t understand that Mr. Mayor then all you are doing is continuing to assert the psychological fear that women have for men. You are proving that you don’t really understand the injustice of this woman’s death or the negative affects your comments have had as they reinforce a social stigma and belief that places half the population in danger.

Asami Nagakiya, another woman I don’t know but for whom my heart bleeds for the injustice of her death. Again, every woman thought it. ‘That could have been me.’

And that is how I feel about the comments the Mayor made. I am not even going to talk about his passive aggressive ‘sorry-not sorry’ apology that just added insult to injury. It was ridiculous. After all the love and commitment she has given to playing the steel pan, a pivotal achievement in our culture, Miss Asami Nagakiya deserved more than your assumptions.

The women of this country are waiting to trust in your judgement again. Please think of your gender and do better.

– Written by Travesaou

Copyright © 2010-2016 Critics May Lie All Rights Reserved

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